Choosing a Suntan over Family

First, never say never. I know that and I get that. But having said that...

This week's episode of Grey's Anatomy struck a chord with me. In this episode one of the couples is discussing having children. One partner wants kids - the other doesn't. But what she does want is "Spain, the beach, you in a bikini and a sangria." Later the partner bemoans to a friend, "she's choosing a suntan over family." Here's the thing though...

I get that.

I get not wanting to have kids. Because I feel fairly safe in saying - I don't want kids myself.

This isn't me giving up on a dream. Not by any stretch. This is just me being honest.

A few years ago one of my dearest friends asked me if I wanted kids of my own or if I was happy being the auntie to my niece and nephew and friends' kids. I said I was happy with where I was in life, but if I met "Mr. Right" sure I'd be open to having kids. She asked me the same thing again recently. My response had changed. Now I said, "I don't think so. In fact, if a guy I was dating wanted kids, it might be a deal breaker." (again, never say never, but...)

Here's where some of this thinking comes from - I recognize there is a lot I can do without kids. And I don't mean to portray kids as a burden with that statement - I certainly hope none of my friends would trade their kids to go back to a life without kids! But to be honest it's only been in the last couple of years that I feel like I'm beginning to live my life. That's an entirely different blog post, but it is an underlying thought to this one. And if you know me, you know one of my greatest desires is to travel. I want to take an extended vacation to Europe - a trip much easier to plan for one than for a family. There's another place which shall remain nameless that I want to travel to, and having kids would completely negate the ability to go there (trust me on this one).

So there you have it. That's how I feel. I know some may read this and question if I really mean it. I may very well wonder the same thing if it were someone else saying it. But yet, there it is.

Now if you'll excuse me, I want to go dream about the havoc I'm going to wreck on Denver in August. Sans kids. :)